I write about things on my blog based on what is happening around me.  Today, I realized I hadn't blogged in several months because I had been procrastinating the task. I like having blog posts on my website so people can see who I am and maybe even benefit from what I write about.  However, thinking of a topic and building it into something useful sometimes is difficult.  Today,  I realized a blog post about procrastination is the perfect topic for a blog. 

Procrastination is something most people do at one time or another.  When it becomes a regular habit, it can have negative impacts on your mood without you really being aware of the cause.  The problem with procrastination is that while we are putting off the thing we are avoiding, we are wasting mental energy thinking about the task.  We are possibly talking negatively to ourselves about not doing what we "should be doing".  This happens when we see evidence of the incomplete task.  For example, when we see the laundry bin overflowing, a small bit of dread or overwhelm may occur.  When we see the calendar with a due date for a work project the heart rate picks up perhaps.  In other words we experience stress in response to the undone task.  Over time, procrastination on more than one thing can lead to difficulty with sleep, negative feelings of self worth and low mood.  

I've heard many defend the virtues of procrastination.  Sometimes procrastination is disguised as a gift to ourselves when we give ourselves a pass on a chore or task that needs doing.  This is a false gift in that the good feeling is short lived.  Eventually, we are faced with the task and a bit worse feeling about it after having avoided it.   Other times we claim that waiting until the last minute makes us more efficient and productive when we do tackle the task.  Anyone who has felt the level of stress that happens in the crunch time related to procrastination knows that's just not healthy or good feeling.  Procrastination is  gifting ourselves more opportunities to stress with more intensity about a task we don't want to do.  
Procrastination can take over on small tasks such as getting the car oil changed, watering the plants or the bigger things such as paying bills, and work projects.  It doesn't really matter the size of the project but putting tasks off just takes pieces of energy we all would rather have for other activities and causing unnecessary stress.  

The trick with procrastination, much like many of the issues I help people with in therapy, is to recognize it is happening.  Once it is identified, procrastination can be stopped.   When I notice I'm putting off a task, I make a plan for when I will start the task and how much I need to get done to feel I've accomplished something.  Sticking to the scheduled start time and breaking tasks down into smaller parts helps me to push through the procrastination.   Once a plan is in place I quit using my energy on the task unless I'm actually, with intention, working on the task.  Motivation to do the thing I was putting off will build once I begin to do the task, not before.  So, the key to kicking procrastination is to make a plan/schedule when the task will get done and start.  After I start, I rarely quit before I've completed enough to feel satisfied with the amount of the task I've completed.  

So, what is that you have been putting off and is stealing your energy and maybe even your good mood? See if my trick works for you.   

I have been thinking about what my blog post could be this month.  I was moved to write about making the decision to go to therapy. I know that deciding to focus on self and change can be a difficult decision and sometimes scary or overwhelming.  Implied in the decision is an openness to change and self reflection.  Change is not something we humans naturally run towards (or even walk towards).  Emotions get a raw deal in our society.  We haven't really made it a habit to focus on emotional education, understanding and expression.  There is still a stigma about therapy.  So, the idea of diving into emotions and change might not be a person's favorite idea.  

I see therapy so differently than that big overwhelming step.   I'm very clear that going to therapy is about investing in your future.  It is about deciding to live toward fulfillment instead of survival.  I value the process of engaging in therapy and believe everyone can benefit from therapy in the same way everyone can benefit from routine visits to their primary care physicians.  I believe in mental health and wellness practices and that is what coming to counseling is to me.  It is an opportunity to learn about and understand and improve your own mental health.  That means different things for different people.  Maybe it is living with less anxiety, or feeling more motivated.  Maybe it means getting along better at school or work, feeling less stressed.  Maybe it means increasing connection and meaning in your relationships to your partner or family members. 

I first became aware of Brene’ Brown through a work colleague.  She became quite a hit in 2010 when she gave a ground breaking TED talk (http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html ).  She is actually a researcher who I believe can inspire amazing ways of looking at our needs as human beings to be perfect.   Many of us have made it a sport to become perfect or try to be perfect. She is a fabulous storyteller and can give some great insights into perfectionism, connection with others and the things that get in the way of our enjoyment.  Listen to her TED Talk.  If you are hooked, visit her website at http://brenebrown.com/.